The Rare Gang

Atahualpa’s Game
[Peruvian]

Sometimes, it’s not wise
To share your wisdom
—as did, Atahualpa
(The Inca King) in the
Game of chess; thereafter,
He was condemned to death.

6/6/05 #713

Note: Atahualpa, was the most famous of the Inca Kings, in the 16th century of Peru, I do relieve, and was held for ransom by the Spaniards. And legend has it, because of a chess game, he was killed, while Catalina Wanka was on her way bringing Gold for his freedom, of which she stopped abruptly, and hid, once finding out, the king was murdered by the Spaniards.

El Juego de Atahualpa

A veces, no es sabio
Compartir su sabidura
—como hizo, Atahualpa
( El Rey inca) en el
Juego de ajedrez; a partir de entonces,
l fue condenado a muerte.

6/6/05 *713

21.

Ica, Witches
[Peruvian]

Do not go to Ica, dear friend
There you may find witches
In toast and bread…

Perhaps lose your head,
Perhaps find them in bed
Perhaps, find yourself dead.

6/6/05 #714 [Ica, is in Northern Peru]

Note: there are stories, that even my wife agrees with, that she has heard that witches haunt this area of Peru; a city in the South part of Peru.

brujas de Ica

No vaya a Ica, querido amigo
All usted puede encontrar brujas-
En tostada y pan …
Quizs pierda su cabeza,
Quizs los encuentre en la cama
Quizs, se encuentre muerto.

6/6/05 *714

Poet/Author Dennis Siluk website: http://dennissiluk.tripod.com

I never thought that I would be cooking rice for my grandson’s finches in my golden years. I am also feeding parakeets, cat, fish and hamsters while the family is on vacation.

The market was out of the item that I specifically went to get and needed for a recipe so I bought some items that I didn’t need and three chocolate bars that I did need. Apparently I stepped on some gum in the store parking lot which I didn’t discover until I got home. I left my shoe on the front porch and went inside to get a scraper. When I got back, the neighbor dog was running off with my shoe. I then tried to clean the gum off of the porch and ended up with gum on my sock. Gave up and ate the chocolate bars.

Painted new numbers on the house. I didn’t realize the paint didn’t wash off with water. I’m sure that it will wear off of my hands eventually. Probably about the time the gum wears off the porch or the dog brings back my shoe.

Did I raise lazy children? Did I spoil them? To be nice, once, I took my son’s stinky dog to be shampooed and have his nails trimmed. I was embarrassed when the grooming people commented, “This poor dog’s nails are way too long. Didn’t you notice him walking funny?”

I meekly answered, “The dog is twenty years old and has arthritis. He always walks funny.” After paying to be made to feel guilty of dog neglect, I took His Majesty home.

I told my son the grooming people said this kind of dog has fast growing nails and needs more attention. Did I get a thank you? Nope. “Why did you wait so long?”

Marge is the library director in a small town in the Northwest, has been writing all her life and just published her first book at age 61.

Mesothelioma is an incredibly unpleasant asbestos-related condition suffered by many workers. It can take very long periods to develop as a cancer that attacks the lungs.

An unnamed family of a man who worked for a company in the Chorley area of Lancashire has just managed to obtain £75,000 as some financial compensation for the death of the 65-year-old labourer.

Nearly 40 years ago he was working on railway carriages, his job was to place asbestos into a machine. On occasion the sheets of asbestos would fall down on the men filling the air with choking dust from the dangerous sheets.

At the time the men were completely without any protective equipment or clothes of any kind, there was also no ventilation installed to remove the dust which would often choke the workers.

The company folded in 2001 but his family were still able to obtain compensation with the help of the health and safety executive and a special fund which companies who dealt with asbestos decades ago have had to contribute to.

Even to this day around 2000 people a year die as a result of contact with the deadly material perhaps three or four decades ago. Asbestos is still found in many buildings and still poses a threat to workers even today.

Companies need to meet stringent health and safety requirements if there is even the slightest possibility that asbestos could be present in a workplace. For full training on all health and safety regulations contact Workplace Law Training to find about their range of accredited IOSH training.

Dothan, AL- Every time I turn around, another Northerner is moving into my neighborhood. I’m beginning to think all my neighbors are Yankees. This is not really a problem, but obviously most of these people are not prepared for how we do things in Dothan. Here are some things you need to know before moving to Dothan.

Never order a bottle of pop or a can of soda in Dothan. It’s referred to as, “Coke”. You don’t have to worry about getting the wrong beverage; the waitress will always ask “what kind of Coke”? If she doesn’t ask, she’s from the North and you have the right to correct her for her failing.

If you order tea, expect for it to be sweetenedand iced. If you want hot tea or unsweetened tea you’ll be wise to let somebody know that you’re not from around here.

We are fully aware of high the humidity is in Dothan; we’ve lived here our whole lives. Look around at our senior ladies; they didn’t get their great complexions out of a bottle. If you don’t believe it have a look at the seniors who spent their whole lives in the dessert. Be thankful for the humidity, we are.

We are also aware of how hot it is in the summertime. We don’t complain about it, we sit in the shade, we move a little slower and we drink a lot of tea. It works you should try it.

Yes, we know how to speak proper English; believe it or not Dothan schools teach English as well as our colleges. We speak this way because we don’t want to sound like you.

Never try to fake a Southern accent, you can’t do it and we will laugh at you just like we did Dan Aykroyd in Driving Miss Daisy.

Misuse of the word Ya’ll is the first indicator of a Yankee faking a Southern accent. “Ya’ll” is always plural as well as it’s possessive “Ya’lls”. “You” and “Your” are used in the singular. Keep it straight.

A southern dialect will naturally creep into your speech. Most Northerners adopt “Big ole” first, as in “Big ole truck”, or “Big ole glass of iced tea”. Though most Northerners adopting a southern accent are in denial about this fact.

It is not wise to ridicule Southern manners. We say sir and ma’am. We seldom make a commotion in public, and we do our best not to be uppity. People who do not have manners weren’t raised rightnuff said.

Never try to explain to someone in Dothan how barbecue should be preparedyou might just end up in a pine box.

We refer to all of our females as ladies, and all of them are, even if you think otherwise.

We know that some of our older drivers have trouble keeping the car in the right lane of traffic. We never yell at them, we just shake our head and say “bless their heart” then say a silent prayer that they will get home safely.

If there is even the slightest prediction of snow, we will close all the schools and you must make your way to the nearest grocery store to buy milk and bread whether you need it or not.

We don’t care if you can drive in the snow, we deserve the time off and we’re going to take it.

You can ask anyone in Dothan for directions, but unless you know where things used to be you’ll continue to be lost. Case in point, “to get your new car tags, turn right at the First National Bank, go past the Houston Hotel and then the Greyhound Bus Terminal, it’s the tall building behind Dothan Federal Savings and Loan, if you get to the Supreme Ice Cream you went too far”.

If you wonder where everyone is on a Sunday morningwe’re in church. You are well advised to stay off the roads between noon and 12:30 on Sunday because the Baptists are trying to beat the Methodists to Piccadilly; it’s not for the faint of heart.

Never attempt to drive past the telephone company on the last date to pay the telephone bill. We park in the middle of the street to make payment regardless of the traffic needing to get by. Just accept it.

Fall marks the beginning of the social season in the south. Some southern cities begin by inviting a select few to very elite parties (e.g., Harvest Ball in Atlanta). In Dothan, we include everybody in the festivities; it’s called the Peanut Festival, same principle but a whole lot more fun.

In short, be respectful of old people, raise your kids right, find a good church, and let Dothan keep the charm it’s always hadthen we’ll all get along just fine.

Ya’ll Come!

David Zack Holmes is an Inspirational/Humor Writer telling his tales with a southern flair. To read other features see: http://www.davidzackholmes.com

Machiavelli, that enduring political philosopher and writer, asked a pivotal question.

If you’re a ruler of society, is it better to be feared or loved?

He equivocated a little, but finally, he settled on fear because it’s more predictable and reliable, and less fickle than love.

A kindred question was asked by Plato in his famous Dialogues:

“Does might make right?”

If you lead an army and you believe that day is night, will you be right, because of the force of arms?

The martial artist believes the opposite to be true: That right makes might.

If you read John Teramoto’s translation of Gichin Funakoshi’s “The Twenty Guiding Principles of Karate,” you’ll see that one of the key points the Master made is that “Karate stands on the side of justice.”

Teramoto & Funakoshi point out that: “Human beings are at their strongest when they believe they are right.”

If you doubt the rightness or justice of your cause, by the same logic, you’re in a weakened state. Anyone with stronger conviction, even if it is induced by drugs or by membership in a gang, can defeat you.

Let’s expand on this thought.

If you are in the right, serving justice, but you don’t know it, or you’re unsure about it, will you also be in a weakened condition?

Probably so, and the obverse applies.

The bad guy, who lacks virtue, who stands for injustice, will be stronger than he should be if he is, however wrongly, convinced of the rightness of his cause.

Therefore, the martial artist must always: (1) Know what virtue is; (2) Convince himself that he is actively pursuing it; and (3) Not hesitate to uphold it.

To the extent he does these things, he’ll be mighty and effective.

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